12 Of The Most Awkward Chest Tattoos People Actually Got Done

Like criminal records and accidental babies, tattoos are forever. If you’re going to put ink on your body, you’re going to want to think over the serious questions first: is this color going to fade well? Should I really get a tattoo in a language I know nothing about (short answer: no)? Will my boyfriend of two weeks appreciate this loving testament to him? Does this cobra really need to be tattooed on my entire face?

Well, most people like to think over the serious questions first. Some people prefer to think about them after the ink has already dried. Or, after the piece has started to flake. Or, frankly, not at all.

These twelve people belong firmly in the second camp. Whether or not you admire their tattoos, you really have to admire their fearless determination to live their truth.

Now, I’m no expert on the Bible, but I don’t think this is featured in any of Jesus’ parables. 

Hopefully, next time, the wind will take you somewhere where the tattoo artist knows how to space their letters properly. Or to write a legible text?

Zipper tattoo opening to reveal an image? Kinda cute! Zipper tattoo opening to reveal an image of a landscape? Weird, but not bad. Zipper tattoo on this specific placement? Hmm.

Okay, this isn’t the worst of the bunch, but let me ask you: do you want to be getting “taste the rainbow” jokes from skeezy men for the rest of your natural life?

What’s the worst part about this Guillermo Del Toro reject? The photorealistic eyes? The weird skin-corset thing that’s not even on the back, where it would make sense? The combination of the two into a monster that looks like it’s begging the viewer to end its unnatural life?

I don’t know what “Whiteboy Swag” is, I don’t know whether it even exists, but I can tell you for sure that this guy does not have it. Even the “kewl” tagging script cannot save him.

What’s the theme of this one, extreme medical malpractice? 

For those disinclined to risk their eyesight deciphering this, it reads, “Your just a friend, just a f**king disease.” Yeah, I’m not sure what that means, either.

Hmm. Well, sir, I regret to inform you that tattoos are also forever.

I don’t know what prompted this gentleman to get this tattoo done and, frankly, given its content, I’d be afraid to ask. 

One time, a friend of mine tattooed herself with a pen and a needle while we were on a beach trip and her skin was covered in sand … and it still turned out better than these. 

And, of course, no list of regrettable body art would be complete without including the mother of all “regrettable” tats. (As this is a fictional tattoo, it wouldn’t be included … except that many people have deliberately gotten duplicates, in real life)

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