Many women (and men!) dream about their fairytale wedding, but the reality can get Grimm a little faster than they’re prepared to deal with.
With so much riding on their special day, it’s natural for the bride or groom-to-be to get stressed out because of minor inconveniences.
But when they start screaming at the florist because the planters are Emerald Mist instead of Shamrock Fog? It might be time to back away slowly.
1. With Friends Like These: “The bride asked me what colour her bridesmaids should wear. I told her that given all five of us were redheads, a pale, pastel lilac is the only colour which should be avoided, as it makes us look dead. Guess what dresses she picked? Floor length silk, pastel lilac. I assumed she’d forgotten. Her sweet husband later told me that of course, the bride has to put bridesmaids in awful dresses because she has to be the prettiest on the day.” (Propertealady)
2. Taking Her Measure: “This lady came in and demanded to be refit. She was claiming they made her dress too small. Our staff quickly took her back and started ensuring their measurements were correct and that they used to have the dress made. Nope. She had gained 15lbs since her fitting. My boss said, “Ma’am, I’m not sure how to say this, but you’ve gotten bigger. The dress matches the measurements we took of you when you ordered the dress.” She threatened to call all kinds of police. Ultimately my boss said, “If you going to call anyone I’d recommend a gym.” The guy was brutal.” (_____FRESH_____)
3. Lord of the Rings: “I love my friend, but she made her groom return her ring four times until she had one that she liked and was big enough for her. I mean, I get that you’re going to be wearing it forever, and it’s a really important symbol of your commitment to each other but…four times?” (avocado-toast)
4. Fairest Of Them All: “A girl I know was a bridesmaid at a wedding. On the morning of the wedding, the bride had a full-on screaming fit and demoted Kate from being a bridesmaid because she had decided that Kate looked too pretty after having her makeup done and the bride wanted to be the prettiest.” (ungratefulshitebag)
5. Signed, Sealed, Delivered: “My good friend was getting married, and I was meeting her for lunch. She had mailed out RSVPs with stamps included for people to mail back. I called to coordinate a meeting up, and said, “I have my RSVP right here, I can give it to you.” She flipped out because I would be wasting the stamp they bought. I still brought it so I could drop it in the mailbox. She literally stood there and watched me put it in the mail, addressed to her…” (Orange_Kid)
6. Oh, Brother: My sister asked me to walk her down the aisle instead of our deadbeat dad since I was the prominent male role model in her life. He threw a fit over this because it’s the “right” of a father and tried to get in a fistfight with the groomsmen over it.” (ERRORMONSTER)
7. Bait and Switch: “She called me to tell my sister and I we were out of the wedding party because we “just weren’t the kind of person she wanted in her wedding”. You know, after we bought the dresses. She then invited other people to take our places at her wedding party, with the expectation that she’d be able to give them the dresses we’d paid for. She called, screaming that I had ruined EVERYTHING when she went to pick up her bridesmaid’s dresses and was 2 short. I had called and cancelled the order, and gotten a refund.” (malarkey)
8. Not According To Keikaku: “Saw a woman in a wedding dress, screaming about all these f*cking freaks being at her wedding. She scheduled her wedding at the same hotel as Acen that year, one of the largest anime conventions in the country. She was not happy and seemed to think that the hotel was her and her guests for the weekend.” (Kup123)
9. Lit: “My cousin got married last April. I got to watch her set her bouquet, the white carpet, and the groom’s pants on fire mid- ceremony because he had spiked his hair wrong. The best part was the minister just kept reading the vows as it all went down. Eventually, they got it all under control and the two said their ‘I Do’s. The divorce was finalized a couple of days ago. (themiddlemile7)
10. Let’s McFreaking Lose It: “When I worked for McDonald’s back in 2006, a wedding party of about 20 people came through the dining room. At the same time, there was an Amish family of about 10 people in the dining room. While the Amish family is leaving, one of the younger daughters accidentally steps on the corner of the bride’s train (it was very long and in the way). So the bride, mouth full of McFood, just let out a blood-curdling scream. No words, just a scream, which startled the whole restaurant and made that poor girl cry.” (staceysmom1969)
11. Got Beef?: “I was working at a catering company back in high school. At one job, I saw the mother of the bride at a wedding pick up the carving knife at the beef carving station and almost stab the guy responsible for the beef. She stopped herself before doing it, but the guy had genuine terror in his eyes.” (Baldguy74)
12. Booby Trap: “I was in a wedding and doing hair/makeup for the gals. The bride looked over the girl, pointed at her cleavage and said: “Can we do anything about THAT?” I was confused at first. Then she started jumping up and down screaming about how her wedding was ruined because of boobs. She demanded that I put Band-Aids on the girl’s boobs to hide “it,” claiming it wasn’t Christian for her to have ANY cleavage in her wedding. I was laughing so hard that I couldn’t oblige and was met with yet another fit of rage. So I pulled my tank top down and flashed her, saying that I wished what I had was as nice as the other bridesmaid and told her to shut up and deal. (I was doing makeup and hair as a courtesy because she couldn’t afford what I would normally charge). Her mom told her to shut up and she stormed off to her room. We all had a good laugh and went for pizza.” (raheli217)
13. Booby Trap: “I was in a wedding and doing hair/makeup for the gals. The bride looked over the girl, pointed at her cleavage and said: “Can we do anything about THAT?” I was confused at first. Then she started jumping up and down screaming about how her wedding was ruined because of boobs. She demanded that I put Band-Aids on the girl’s boobs to hide “it,” claiming it wasn’t Christian for her to have ANY cleavage in her wedding. I was laughing so hard that I couldn’t oblige and was met with yet another fit of rage. So I pulled my tank top down and flashed her, saying that I wished what I had was as nice as the other bridesmaid and told her to shut up and deal. (I was doing makeup and hair as a courtesy because she couldn’t afford what I would normally charge). Her mom told her to shut up and she stormed off to her room. We all had a good laugh and went for pizza.” (raheli217)
14. Say Yes To The Mess: “So my ex-girlfriend was getting married and was having second thoughts about it. She calls me at 8 am that day in hysterics to ask if I was planning to come to the ceremony. I politely tell her “no I would rather staple my head to my front porch”. She then goes on for 20 more minutes about how she was hoping that I would show up, interrupts the wedding and we run off. I tell her that will absolutely not be happening and I hung up. About an hour later I get a text from a good friend who was at the wedding party telling me my ex went on a rampage and DESTROYED her dressing room (busted mirrors, flipped furniture etc). The marriage lasted less than a year.” (godbullseye)
15. I…Don’t?: An ex-friend of mine threw a wedding but didn’t actually marry the groom. Yes, you read right. They threw a big expensive wedding and asked everyone for gifts but did not really get married. On Facebook for almost a year she’s been reposting pictures from the wedding, talking about how he “grabs the booty” and how much she loves her “husband”. Every single person I tell this to finds it super weird” (elsorz)
16. Motel Hell: “I worked at a motel that held a big wedding party, and one of the bride’s sons was drunk and running around naked. When the police showed up to arrest the guy, the bride was yelling at me about why I would ruin her day by locking up her 18 yr old son and fighting the police and me. She got real aggressive Luckily the groom was there to stop her from punching me. I hope the guy got an annulment.” (just nod along)
17. Yikes: “Sister-in-law told my partner she couldn’t bring me to her destination wedding because she didn’t want my partner’s homosexuality to be a distraction on her big day. This was after she asked their mother not to invite us to a big family get-together. Her reason: she didn’t want our autistic son there, because she wanted her daughter to play with the other cousins without him present. The partner didn’t attend the wedding, btw.” (CorvusFemina)
18. Save The Date: “I have a friend who is getting married in 2019. One of her friends set her wedding date for the same date, but in 2018. The first girl flew into a rage at this because it was “her day” and actually persuaded the second girl and her fiance to change the date.” (Drunk)
19. Bad Cop/Bad Cop: “This one was a groomzilla moment. We had a bride ask for us to re-do her dress because hers had a stain on it, and we happily obliged. But her husband, oh, her husband. We offered to give them a discount for the inconvenience, but he said it wasn’t enough and started shouting at us, telling us he was going to get us to shut down. Even better, he pulled his police officer’s badge on us and started asking us if we knew who he was. Uh, yeah, a really terrible cop?” (Samwise_Vimes)
20. Speach! Speach! Speach!: My sister caused a huge scene at her wedding dinner because I (the maid of honour) did not want to do a speech. She knows I am deathly afraid of public speaking, I had nothing prepared and it was never expressed to me that she wanted me to say something. Also, she was the maid of honour at my wedding and didn’t speak either.” (Pursuit_of_Hoppiness)
21. Hmm: “I am getting married this weekend, so I post a lot on /r/weddingplanning. A few days ago someone posted asking for advice on what she should put in the ‘contract’ she was going to make her bridesmaids sign. Among the things she was considering- no new tattoos or piercing, no hair color or style changes, no getting pregnant, no going tanning…..for a wedding that was over a year away.” (hotel_girl985)
22. That’s A Lot Of Layers: “The bride got mad that her Victoria Sponge wedding cake was assembled wrong. It went, from bottom up, sponge, cream, jam, sponge, icing/decorations. It should have gone sponge, jam, cream, sponge, icing/decorations. I understand that a wedding cake is a crucially important item at the wedding and it needs to be perfect. Stil…” (MunkeyFish)
23. 20/20 Hindsight: “Not to me, but to my sister: her boyfriend’s sister was getting married that day and my sister came to their house early to help her into the dress. They came out of a room at the same time, and the father of the bride wasn’t able to see his daughter clearly, so he told my sister that she looked beautiful that day. The bride got offended because she thought her father had ignored her, and they had to spend an hour trying to coax her out of the room she locked herself into to cry and scream.” (BB8ball)
24. There’s A Lot To Unpack Here: “Ex-mother-in-law attacked my mother… literally pushed her into a booth and climbed on top of her ready to start beating her up. A good friend of mine grabbed the woman and held her while some friends came and got me. Meanwhile, her 15-year-old daughter was drunk and doing coke, booty dancing with no underwear.” (N0PowerInTheVerse)
